28.1.06

一個人的除夕前夕

一向充塞著人群的城市在短短的一夜之間變成一座死城 。原本就沒有內涵的都市﹐每當佳節來臨時就會名符其實地剩下沒有靈魂的軀體 。

因為祖母剛過世﹐還有一些可以寫成一本鬧劇的理由﹐我決定一個人獨守這空城﹐在這座距離家鄉只有四五個鐘頭車程的游子城迎接新年的來臨 。

屋友走後﹐房子空蕩蕩的﹐頓時覺得非常空虛 。做功課嘛﹐好像還不是很急﹔做 Freelance 嘛﹐沒有心情 。想想﹐還是著手開始自己一直都想成立的一個小部落﹐就在今晚﹐一個人的除夕前夕 。

時間是凌晨十二點點點﹐距離新的一年還有二十三個小時多 。 想必現在大部份的人一定都已經回到家裡和家人團聚在一起﹐或者至少往回家的路上了 。 再想想﹐自己好像很多很多年沒跟家人吃團圓飯﹐但之前至少還待在同一個屋檐下﹐現在 ... ...

新年近在眼睫﹐還是別想那麼多了 。事情總會有撥雲見月的一天﹐至少我是那麼期盼著的 。但願別像現在悠揚耳邊的 Sheila On SevenBerhenti Berharap 那樣就好了 。

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3 Comments:

Blogger moguamei said...

actually u ahv the choice but u choose to stay alone at KL. To me nothing is impossible, juz tat u have to take action, make the 1st move, everything wil b alrite. u all r stil family eventhough u got diff opinion wf them. our parents r old oredy, no matter how wrong they r,still they r our parents, this we hav no choice.wat we can do is accept n try to understand,to forgive...after all u had quarrel wf them.ur parents should b very sad when u were not back during new year, even more sad if i m ur father when i knew tat u actually did back to pg but refused to go home....n im sure u r not happy too rite...so pandai pandai lah...i juz hope tat u wil b happy n no regret wf wat u hav done.
hav a nice day!

2/02/2006 02:06:00 am  
Anonymous way5577 said...

aiya, i know. actually, i just wanna 'likai' tis 'fenfenraorao' for the moment. though they didn't call me at all :(, but, i did send sms to my brother on cny eve (with no reply) and call back on new year 1st day. my stepmom answer one.

b4 all tis 'wuhui?!', sometime, when i go back to penang also, i don quite like go back to my home, remember? our distances not because one problem. aiya, long stori.

i just fedup, because i'm 'wanbei', but still, always i'm the one who take initiatif to try to improve the thing. actually, as a 'wanbei' not much i can do if they don wan to improve. after all, 28 years already.

yup, u r rite, i also donwan to stay alone at kl, but, i lagi donwan to go back and all people 'min-cho-cho'.
all tis year, we always tak makan tuanyuanfan. b4 tis, even when we are all at home on cny eve also, makan masing-masing one: my father will ask me and my bother to eat first, after that, he eat wif my stepmom. as the kid, sometimes, you also will wonder why... ...

aiya, maybe i'm still not 'jiji' enough, but, i penat already.

2/02/2006 04:53:00 am  
Anonymous way5577 said...

btw, thanks for the advice...

2/02/2006 04:58:00 am  

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